RAYMO’S RAMBLINGS – DAD

dad

It is Father’s Day today and as always I think of my dad on this day! I was only thirty-five when he died. My dad died when he was sixty-five, relatively young yet. I’m sixty years old now and to think in five years I will be the age my dad was when he died. It has been twenty-five years since he left us. I was present when he had his heart attack at his desk at work. It was the worst day of my life. The images of that day are still engrained into my mind clearly. I don’t know why this is, but when I think of my dad I think of that day he died and left us. When I think of him I should be thinking immediately about what a terrific father he was, but instead my mind takes me to that terrible day, Oct 12th 1993.

So today I choose to think about the dad that loved and cared deeply for his family and friends. His name was Carrell. He provided for his family. Dad started a business with his two brothers in law in 1960. He was very proud of the success of the foundry that they built together. We produced manhole covers that you see in the streets that are all over the country. I worked in the family business for some thirty years.  I saw my dad every day at work. So our relationship was close. We spent a lot of time together.

My earliest memory of my dad is kind of weird. I maybe was 4 or 5 years old. My dad was a smoker and he would lay in his bed smoking and I would lay next to him watching the red glow of his cigarette in the darkness. Liking the smell of the cigarette and waiting for the red glow of the cigarette to appear when he took a puff. I told you it was weird! That was in the early 1960’s when it seemed like everyone smoked. I never have had the desire to smoke cigarettes and I’m thankful for that.

My favorite memory of my dad was the day we were at the cabin on Big Stone Lake in Ortonville. Dad was driving the boat and I was learning to water ski. I was in my early twenties. To make a long story short, I fell in the middle of the lake and could not get back up. After trying and trying I gave up. Meanwhile the ski rope got tangled in the propeller and we had a big mess. I was exhausted and here I was floating in the lake. Dad thought he would slide off the back of the boat to help me get the rope untangled from the propeller. I don’t know what he was thinking, but when he slid off the back of the boat he disappeared under water and never came back up to the surface. He wasn’t wearing a life jacket.  I desperately tried to reach for him under water and finally grabbed his arm pulling him to the surface. He almost drowned.

Now both of us big guys are in the water, and we have no ladder to get back into the boat! We are stranded in the water, in the middle of the lake! My brother Greg saw we were in trouble and took an inner tube and swam out to us. He was able to pull himself into the boat. We got the ski rope untangled and my brother towed dad and me behind the boat to the shore. We were like beached wales, completely exhausted! While lying on the beach we had mom, my wife Roxie and my grandmother hovering over us yelling at the top of their lungs at both of us for being so stupid! Dad and I laughed so hard we couldn’t breathe, we would look at each other laying on the beach and laugh harder.

That is my funniest and best memory I have of my dad. We told that story so many times over the years and each time crying with laughter.  I have many good memories of my dad. I loved him very much. He was a great father to all of us. I rarely saw him get angry, he was always kind to everyone, wanting to help anybody that had a need. Happy Father’s Day dad! Love you!

It is Father’s Day today and as always I think of my dad on this day! I was only thirty-five when he died. My dad died when he was sixty-five, relatively young yet. I’m sixty years old now and to think in five years I will be the age my dad was when he died. It has been twenty-five years since he left us. I was present when he had his heart attack at his desk at work. It was the worst day of my life. The images of that day are still engrained into my mind clearly. I don’t know why this is, but when I think of my dad I think of that day he died and left us. When I think of him I should be thinking immediately about what a terrific father he was, but instead my mind takes me to that terrible day, Oct 12th 1993.

So today I choose to think about the dad that loved and cared deeply for his family and friends. His name was Carrell. He provided for his family. Dad started a business with his two brothers in law in 1960. He was very proud of the success of the foundry that they built together. We produced manhole covers that you see in the streets that are all over the country. I worked in the family business for some thirty years.  I saw my dad every day at work. So our relationship was close. We spent a lot of time together.

My earliest memory of my dad is kind of weird. I maybe was 4 or 5 years old. My dad was a smoker and he would lay in his bed smoking and I would lay next to him watching the red glow of his cigarette in the darkness. Liking the smell of the cigarette and waiting for the red glow of the cigarette to appear when he took a puff. I told you it was weird! That was in the early 1960’s when it seemed like everyone smoked. I never have had the desire to smoke cigarettes and I’m thankful for that.

My favorite memory of my dad was the day we were at the cabin on Big Stone Lake in Ortonville. Dad was driving the boat and I was learning to water ski. I was in my early twenties. To make a long story short, I fell in the middle of the lake and could not get back up. After trying and trying I gave up. Meanwhile the ski rope got tangled in the propeller and we had a big mess. I was exhausted and here I was floating in the lake. Dad thought he would slide off the back of the boat to help me get the rope untangled from the propeller. I don’t know what he was thinking, but when he slid off the back of the boat he disappeared under water and never came back up to the surface. He wasn’t wearing a life jacket.  I desperately tried to reach for him under water and finally grabbed his arm pulling him to the surface. He almost drowned.

Now both of us big guys are in the water, and we have no ladder to get back into the boat! We are stranded in the water, in the middle of the lake! My brother Greg saw we were in trouble and took an inner tube and swam out to us. He was able to pull himself into the boat. We got the ski rope untangled and my brother towed dad and me behind the boat to the shore. We were like beached wales, completely exhausted! While lying on the beach we had mom, my wife Roxie and my grandmother hovering over us yelling at the top of their lungs at both of us for being so stupid! Dad and I laughed so hard we couldn’t breathe, we would look at each other laying on the beach and laugh harder.

That is my funniest and best memory I have of my dad. We told that story so many times over the years and each time crying with laughter.  I have many good memories of my dad. I loved him very much. He was a great father to all of us. I rarely saw him get angry, he was always kind to everyone, wanting to help anybody that had a need. Happy Father’s Day dad! Love you!

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RAYMO’S RAMBLINGS – FATHERHOOD BEGINS IN THE DELIVERY ROOM

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FATHERHOOD BEGINS IN THE DELIVERY ROOM

I was in the delivery room at Johnson Memorial Hospital in Dawson on June 30th 1977, two nurses were attending to me on both sides, trying to hold me up and kept asking me if I am going to be ok. Dr. Maus would occasionally look at me and ask “you OK Paul?” I was sweating and crying, I was a big mess!  You see at 10:32pm on Thursday June 30th 1977 I became a father for the first time. I was so overcome with emotions, that I could hardly function in that delivery room. But I did make it through the birthing process which wasn’t easy for me. I was completely exhausted after that ordeal. And oh, my wife Roxie was in the delivery room too and she did just fine.

They can teach you many things in the baby classes that we took, but nothing can prepare you for what you actually go through giving birth. Watching my wife give birth for the first time was hard.  I felt so sorry for her, in the 70’s they didn’t use many drugs to relieve the pain of childbirth like they do now. There was a lot of screaming going on! My daughter in law recently gave birth and I asked her how it went giving birth, and she said “Oh, I felt a little pressure when he came out” OMG!

The reason I was having so much trouble in the delivery room is I thought for sure she was going to die!! And all I could think of was…..that I’m responsible for her having to go through this agony.

But you know, they say when you first see that baby and get to hold him, all the pain of childbirth is gone. It’s just pure joy and excitement, and that is so true.

Anyways, back to fatherhood. I became a father for the first time that day, and since then, I paid two more visits to the delivery room and a visit to the Minneapolis/St. Paul airport to have another child. The airport pickup was a lot less painful, but just as emotional. When the adoptive social worker placed out daughter in our arms at the airport off the plane from Korea, it was the same feeling as being in the hospital delivery room.

 I love being a father. Sure I could have done a better job at being a father, and maybe been around more in the earlier days, but do you know what I’m most proud of as a father? That my three boys, Josh, Jeremy, and Brandon have become fathers themselves and are awesome dads! All three of them do a super job at being a father. I enjoy watching them interact with their own children and to see how much they love them. I see my boys spending more time with their kids, then I did with them. One of my all-time favorite quotes is this. “The most important thing a father can do for his kids, is to love their mother” and I sure see that evidence in my sons as well.  So I must have done something right, and that is what I’m most proud of as a father.

So on this Father’s Day, we honor the Fathers.

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